My first thought after reading this was “discovering shalom auslander might be the best thing that’s happened to me this year.” As if I’d “discovered” you! I’m a newb.
What a lovely thank you note! My debut memoir is out this July and I’m on the pole big time, but I feel better knowing we’re on it together. Sorry if that conjures a problematic image.
Thank you for writing such amazing stuff, Shalom. For my part, I’m so grateful for Substack because, were it not for this platform, I wouldn’t have discovered you.
Your book Hope: A Tragedy is sitting on my nightstand beckoning, and I can’t wait to delve in. Thank you for writing such amazing, funny, and more often than not relatable words.
No don’t i am a broke musician and a hopeless poet and i cant even resolve to street begging since my sax was stolen. So pretty please with cherries don’t raise the fucking prices(unless you are being facetious, in which case I promise i’m laughing on the inside
Oh, God. Now, I can't unsee your Sisyphean image of pushing the bike up to the highway ramp with the help of a person in four-inch heels. So, does this mean all these pitches I'm sending out to be a guest on someone's weird podcast and the instagram lives I'm doing will never end? Move over. I'm curling up in the fetal position with you. You're welcome!
I can proudly say I was 1 of those 400,000 (and apologize I didn’t count for 600,000 more!) the show was great. I am glad to see you on Substack. You’ve officially earned another reader. Looking forward to more work by you.
I identify thoroughly with this column. The difference between us is that I wrote the novels and have ignored the social media that would sell them. I'm just too lazy to self-promote, but I'm retired so there's that. I don't write finished pieces any longer, just stuff on Facebook.
Good luck with the novel! I'll buy it, so you can honestly promise a publisher that there's a market for it.
I worked In a market in Chelsea - ‘68 or ‘69. When were you there? Well. No matter. Really. Glad you’re enjoying the freedom of being your own pimp at least! <g>
My first thought after reading this was “discovering shalom auslander might be the best thing that’s happened to me this year.” As if I’d “discovered” you! I’m a newb.
Amen to this.
What a lovely thank you note! My debut memoir is out this July and I’m on the pole big time, but I feel better knowing we’re on it together. Sorry if that conjures a problematic image.
Thank you for writing such amazing stuff, Shalom. For my part, I’m so grateful for Substack because, were it not for this platform, I wouldn’t have discovered you.
Your book Hope: A Tragedy is sitting on my nightstand beckoning, and I can’t wait to delve in. Thank you for writing such amazing, funny, and more often than not relatable words.
Yours, Andrei, a fellow writer.
Don’t wait! It’s superb.
I just finished it. You were right, it was superb! Thanks for the nudge.
I’m so glad!
Hey. If you’re happy with this, think how much happier you’d be if you raised your price.
No don’t i am a broke musician and a hopeless poet and i cant even resolve to street begging since my sax was stolen. So pretty please with cherries don’t raise the fucking prices(unless you are being facetious, in which case I promise i’m laughing on the inside
Oh, God. Now, I can't unsee your Sisyphean image of pushing the bike up to the highway ramp with the help of a person in four-inch heels. So, does this mean all these pitches I'm sending out to be a guest on someone's weird podcast and the instagram lives I'm doing will never end? Move over. I'm curling up in the fetal position with you. You're welcome!
I didn't want to read this today.
But I had to.
Because whoredom sells.
Apparently.
Jesus.
Thanks.
I think you’ll need to find the prostitute and give her a copy of your book when it’s out ….
If I must, I must...
Hurry up and finish that novel! I'll tuck a five into your G-string.
I can proudly say I was 1 of those 400,000 (and apologize I didn’t count for 600,000 more!) the show was great. I am glad to see you on Substack. You’ve officially earned another reader. Looking forward to more work by you.
I'm 67 so I've been whoring for a long time!
I identify thoroughly with this column. The difference between us is that I wrote the novels and have ignored the social media that would sell them. I'm just too lazy to self-promote, but I'm retired so there's that. I don't write finished pieces any longer, just stuff on Facebook.
Good luck with the novel! I'll buy it, so you can honestly promise a publisher that there's a market for it.
This is the best Thank You note I ever received, and your mother didn't even make you write it!
Thank you too for being YOU, funny - desperate - smart - sincere, and for reaching out to others
Often I think of you, when I wish I could lie down in a fœtal position or have a damn good absurd laugh, and I don’t feel alone anymore.
8 billions human beings and counting, and how often we feel lonely and surrounded by danger.
Like you in that city suburb. Find a helping hand and a bit of companionship in a dark night is the best isn’t it?
That about sums it up, Sybille, yes.
I’m watching Happy-Ish again. Loved it first time around and still do. Thanks for your work.
Where did you find it?
It’s on Hulu.
Going to go to my son’s and have him bring it up (we’re dinosaurs and don’t have Hulu)
Thank you David
I suppose we’re all required to sell ourselves to some degree, regardless of our role - the world’s oldest profession is ubiquitous.
I worked In a market in Chelsea - ‘68 or ‘69. When were you there? Well. No matter. Really. Glad you’re enjoying the freedom of being your own pimp at least! <g>
This was mid-90's. But, uh - "worked" how?
Grocery store. I was 16/17.
Ha!