This is one of the reasons I prefer to drive old cars, ones that already have dents and dings. So when that person with the expensive, well-maintained car tries to cut the line because having that expensive well-maintained car makes them feel entitled, I don't care. I don't care about my car. And they obviously do. So when push comes to shove, I'm more than happy to risk a scrape or a dent while they have a heart attack if a pigeon shits on their windshield. It's petty, but it's what keeps me calm on exit ramps...the actual superiority of having an old crap car.
I noticed you use in line and on line interchangeably. You must be a west coaster by way of the east coast (as am I). I frequently get corrected when I say on line. I am now told that in line is definitively the correct way to signify waiting in (on) a line, because if I was on line I would be on the internet. Having been born in New York in the (19)60's, I guess my parents weren't wise enough to know that a future invention would make my vocabulary the subject of ridicule.
They did, however, teach me to wait my turn like a human fucking being.
Man, Auslander! I'm going to plagiarize the hell out of this line: "...shallow materialism, mindless susceptibility to marketing and desperate need for external validation..." Not really ... but I fear you have pegged California society utterly in 12 words.
NYC supermarket- long line, slow cashiers ‘cause they don’t care - 2 people cut the entire line - I say um excuse me and give that NYC are u ‘f’ing kidding slack jaw’+eye roll and she says, OHHHH there’s a line???? And I do the lip thing that signals “you’re a grifter and an idiot” She turns to her friend then to me w the frowny-I-might-cry face and whines BEEEEE KINNNNNNND! AITAH? NO.That is all😆😆😆
The brits have mastered lines. Remember the line for viewing the queen? Surely one of the most amazing lines. And David Beckham waiting in it like everyone else who isn’t as hot or rich or famous.
I like the Indian Method as seen in every transport hub in India. Survival of the fittest. No queues. Get on using whatever method works...pushing, shoving, kicking the old, it's a brutal world and it's best the young learn early how brutal it is. It sharpens their senses and helps develop initiative.
That's when my sons were born and my wife handed me them, swaddled in warm blankets and resting peacefully, I punched them in the face. Never to early to start raising them properly.
That’s the spirit. Bet they have no problem now jumping queues and ignoring other quaint British pastimes like having afternoon tea and guzzling gravy over chips.
Yup. Been there, done that - getting on a train through the window and then fighting my way to the luggage rack (aka sleeping rack), after struggling through the melee at the ticket window. Mind you, I was only about 20 at the time. Looong time ago.
Oh at last. A comprehensive User Manual. I look forward to each chapter with eager anticipation. I hope this material gets into schools and colleges rather quickly.
One of the things about riding a bicycle in traffic is, when a line has formed at a red light, if all the cars are far enough from the curb, you can glide by all of them and A) place your ass directly in front of the car in front, or B) if the light changes, merge and take the lane as the cars slowly get moving. B is needed because if you just stay all the way over to the right you run the risk that someone making a right turn won't see you and will "right swipe" you. A is needed for the same reason but depending on how the intersection is laid out I might stay right but lead the lead car radically so they will see me.
I don't feel bad because they all hate me anyway, and they are piloting pollution spewing, pavement destroying death machines.
So there you have it. Otherwise I never violate the rules of lines.
This is one of the reasons I prefer to drive old cars, ones that already have dents and dings. So when that person with the expensive, well-maintained car tries to cut the line because having that expensive well-maintained car makes them feel entitled, I don't care. I don't care about my car. And they obviously do. So when push comes to shove, I'm more than happy to risk a scrape or a dent while they have a heart attack if a pigeon shits on their windshield. It's petty, but it's what keeps me calm on exit ramps...the actual superiority of having an old crap car.
"Defensive driving" in LA is driving a beat-up Prius. Come at me, Cybertruck.
My super power. This.
I’m 81 years old.
May I give you an age-appropriate kiss for this?
W.A.I.T. indeed 😘
Hell with age-appropriate, Judith. Give it all you got, girl! If not now, when?
I noticed you use in line and on line interchangeably. You must be a west coaster by way of the east coast (as am I). I frequently get corrected when I say on line. I am now told that in line is definitively the correct way to signify waiting in (on) a line, because if I was on line I would be on the internet. Having been born in New York in the (19)60's, I guess my parents weren't wise enough to know that a future invention would make my vocabulary the subject of ridicule.
They did, however, teach me to wait my turn like a human fucking being.
Q: What if I’m physically attractive? Do the line rules contain exceptions for people who think they’re hot?
A: No, they do not
You obviously have never been to a trendy nightclub... 😂😂😂
I went. Once. Still having the flashbacks.
There might be a recovery program... 🤔
Line leader for life 🦋😁💫
The kid in kindergarten who always has to be line leader - watch out. That fucker's crazy.
Man, Auslander! I'm going to plagiarize the hell out of this line: "...shallow materialism, mindless susceptibility to marketing and desperate need for external validation..." Not really ... but I fear you have pegged California society utterly in 12 words.
The most egregious abuse of lines I know is Duran Duran covering Grandmaster Flash and Melle Mel's 'White Lines'
NYC supermarket- long line, slow cashiers ‘cause they don’t care - 2 people cut the entire line - I say um excuse me and give that NYC are u ‘f’ing kidding slack jaw’+eye roll and she says, OHHHH there’s a line???? And I do the lip thing that signals “you’re a grifter and an idiot” She turns to her friend then to me w the frowny-I-might-cry face and whines BEEEEE KINNNNNNND! AITAH? NO.That is all😆😆😆
Did you know that in the south we stand IN line, not ON?
Or we don't. Bless our hearts.
Great piece. I always feel terrible if I realize last minute I’m in the wrong lane and have to squeeze in the car line up.
I remember the UK having very respectful lines.
The brits have mastered lines. Remember the line for viewing the queen? Surely one of the most amazing lines. And David Beckham waiting in it like everyone else who isn’t as hot or rich or famous.
I hate to disappoint you, but we Brits don't do lines....we queue.
Well, *some* do lines. That sort don't tend to be very good at queuing, mind...
Yes! I saw Beckham in his documentary. Queue up.
This won't work in Italy or china, and possibly many other countries where lines are not lines, but a crowd of people who are all first....
I like the Indian Method as seen in every transport hub in India. Survival of the fittest. No queues. Get on using whatever method works...pushing, shoving, kicking the old, it's a brutal world and it's best the young learn early how brutal it is. It sharpens their senses and helps develop initiative.
That's when my sons were born and my wife handed me them, swaddled in warm blankets and resting peacefully, I punched them in the face. Never to early to start raising them properly.
That’s the spirit. Bet they have no problem now jumping queues and ignoring other quaint British pastimes like having afternoon tea and guzzling gravy over chips.
Yup. Been there, done that - getting on a train through the window and then fighting my way to the luggage rack (aka sleeping rack), after struggling through the melee at the ticket window. Mind you, I was only about 20 at the time. Looong time ago.
Oh at last. A comprehensive User Manual. I look forward to each chapter with eager anticipation. I hope this material gets into schools and colleges rather quickly.
I finally have closure on my lifelong confusion about lines. Who knew that's what WAIT stood for???
One of the things about riding a bicycle in traffic is, when a line has formed at a red light, if all the cars are far enough from the curb, you can glide by all of them and A) place your ass directly in front of the car in front, or B) if the light changes, merge and take the lane as the cars slowly get moving. B is needed because if you just stay all the way over to the right you run the risk that someone making a right turn won't see you and will "right swipe" you. A is needed for the same reason but depending on how the intersection is laid out I might stay right but lead the lead car radically so they will see me.
I don't feel bad because they all hate me anyway, and they are piloting pollution spewing, pavement destroying death machines.
So there you have it. Otherwise I never violate the rules of lines.
This is sheer brilliance. I’ll let you cut in front of me on the 10 to go South on the 405 a mile after the line started because of this.
Waze --> Settings --> "No highways"