I like the idea of an air horn. I lived in Powellton village in the '60s. Every time FBI would come in (supposedly incognito) someone would blow an air horn to notify the neighborhood. It was wildly wonderful for an elementary school kid.
This is fascinating. Synchronicity is a marvelous thing. In the parallel worlds we occupy, I've spent the afternoon writing an essay about being molested in the Metropolitan Museum of Art's gift shop when I was 13. Penises abound. What to do.
That (and mediocre coffee) is what you get for patronizing Starbuck's.
My first thought was that he must have a terrible rash. The second, that it is his way of self-soothing, and otherwise he would have pulled out a gun, so consider yourself lucky.
It’s so easy to get distracted from the real task of writing these days, and I can imagine that a story about all those conflicting emotions about the conflict in Gaza is easy to get distracted from… in a strange abnormal way, you could almost thank this guy for the ability to ponder what is so interesting in his pants instead of the madness that’s happening almost everywhere else…
ah, if only i could tell you what it was like growing up female in texas in the 50-60’s. it was like running a gauntlet. your experience gives you an idea.
Your sentence: "How do we keep the wings of our soul level through the turbulence of existence?" is such a gem it made me almost grateful to this disgusting guy because his carrying-on irritated a pearl like that from you. Other than that, I suspect he has some form of dementia. I mean a 60+ guy who has clearly reverted to what 2 year olds do in public until they are told to "Hey put that away." Really. Or am I hopelessly out of touch?
No. Young and old, that is a frequent behavior here in Midwest- and that's not including Starbucks. As a guy it is easier and somewhat safer, I tell them to stop and go home and wash.
Wow. Good for you. Even though I live where guys pee and sleep (not a homeless person, a sleepy person) just where they feel like in the street. But this is a new one for me.
So this is this guy’s version of what is ok in public versus home. Also, what is needed is a really loud, unabashed older person who screams,”What the hell are you doing?! Stop that! Oh my eyes!! Make him stop!!” while pointing at him, clutching their chest. It might make him stop for a few days, like spraying water on a cat that scratches the couch, but it’s ineffective really. Cats don’t stop the behavior, they just get afraid of spray bottles and water and continue to scratch the couch. This dude will probably not fondle himself in front of an older person in a Starbucks, but have no problem grossing everyone out at Dunkin Donuts, for example.
Perhaps we should do positive reinforcement- buy him a pastry or a drink when his hands stay out of his pants for longer than 10 minutes? “ What a good boy! Here’s a scone!” Maybe like breath mints, we could politely and silently offer a fidget spinner to keep his other hand occupied. I dunno.
And yeah- I’ve never understood human males having all their reproductive organs on the outside, that is a serious design flaw.
Growing up as a young girl in the 50s and 60s this happened to me all the time. Subway, movie theater, bus, cars on the street. Usually they took it out as well.
Ok he wasn’t WATCHING porno but I bet he was writing it. And it probably wasn’t “mindless” - he’s in pubic oh sorry typo he’s in public, he has enough brain power to write (porno) so he has enough wherewithal to know exactly what he doing.
Ewwwww
In a word, yes.
I second that emotion...
Unlikely, but maybe he’s meditating on his recently installed smooth patch of Ken Doll Nothingness?
no one even considers ken doll nothingness anymore, smh
😂
his role for the morning was content provider
Always carry an air horn in your handbag. Or bear spray, depending. You won't regret it.
I like the idea of an air horn. I lived in Powellton village in the '60s. Every time FBI would come in (supposedly incognito) someone would blow an air horn to notify the neighborhood. It was wildly wonderful for an elementary school kid.
Reminds me that in my town many years ago there was a stripper whose stage name was Fonda Peters
Ugh! A guy can't even fondle himself in public without being the subject of an essay!
This is fascinating. Synchronicity is a marvelous thing. In the parallel worlds we occupy, I've spent the afternoon writing an essay about being molested in the Metropolitan Museum of Art's gift shop when I was 13. Penises abound. What to do.
Very sorry, Nan. At 16, I used to use the Met gift shop to sneak in without being asked to pay. Also, shoplifted a book on Rodin or one on Chagall.
I hope that helps.
I'm proud of you for that, you rebel. xo
That (and mediocre coffee) is what you get for patronizing Starbuck's.
My first thought was that he must have a terrible rash. The second, that it is his way of self-soothing, and otherwise he would have pulled out a gun, so consider yourself lucky.
I'd have preferred the gun.
Perhaps you would, but those of us who look forward to the words you share would prefer you stay in this world and keep writing.
As Homer Simpson (although for all I know, the earlier Homer may well have originated the phrase) said: Avert your gaze.
Scary, but LA....
Wow - I would have sworn up and down that it has one. Thanks for the correction.
It’s so easy to get distracted from the real task of writing these days, and I can imagine that a story about all those conflicting emotions about the conflict in Gaza is easy to get distracted from… in a strange abnormal way, you could almost thank this guy for the ability to ponder what is so interesting in his pants instead of the madness that’s happening almost everywhere else…
ah, if only i could tell you what it was like growing up female in texas in the 50-60’s. it was like running a gauntlet. your experience gives you an idea.
As for why you say you write ✨✨✨
Your sentence: "How do we keep the wings of our soul level through the turbulence of existence?" is such a gem it made me almost grateful to this disgusting guy because his carrying-on irritated a pearl like that from you. Other than that, I suspect he has some form of dementia. I mean a 60+ guy who has clearly reverted to what 2 year olds do in public until they are told to "Hey put that away." Really. Or am I hopelessly out of touch?
No. Young and old, that is a frequent behavior here in Midwest- and that's not including Starbucks. As a guy it is easier and somewhat safer, I tell them to stop and go home and wash.
Wow. Good for you. Even though I live where guys pee and sleep (not a homeless person, a sleepy person) just where they feel like in the street. But this is a new one for me.
So this is this guy’s version of what is ok in public versus home. Also, what is needed is a really loud, unabashed older person who screams,”What the hell are you doing?! Stop that! Oh my eyes!! Make him stop!!” while pointing at him, clutching their chest. It might make him stop for a few days, like spraying water on a cat that scratches the couch, but it’s ineffective really. Cats don’t stop the behavior, they just get afraid of spray bottles and water and continue to scratch the couch. This dude will probably not fondle himself in front of an older person in a Starbucks, but have no problem grossing everyone out at Dunkin Donuts, for example.
Perhaps we should do positive reinforcement- buy him a pastry or a drink when his hands stay out of his pants for longer than 10 minutes? “ What a good boy! Here’s a scone!” Maybe like breath mints, we could politely and silently offer a fidget spinner to keep his other hand occupied. I dunno.
And yeah- I’ve never understood human males having all their reproductive organs on the outside, that is a serious design flaw.
Somehow the reference to Dunkin' Donuts here just makes things worse. 😬 🍩 😂
Haha. Yeah. Risk management. That’s the answer.
Growing up as a young girl in the 50s and 60s this happened to me all the time. Subway, movie theater, bus, cars on the street. Usually they took it out as well.
same
Ok he wasn’t WATCHING porno but I bet he was writing it. And it probably wasn’t “mindless” - he’s in pubic oh sorry typo he’s in public, he has enough brain power to write (porno) so he has enough wherewithal to know exactly what he doing.
Perhaps this begs a larger question, is Los Angeles infested with crabs?
According to the crabs, it's infested with humans.