I remember when cell phones had only been around for a year or two (way before they could stream music or video content), there were people who would have phone conversations in public. And because they were receiving a special call on something called a cellular phone that was new, they decided that possibly the cellular phone did not know what a phone call was. This made it necessary to talk IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS like a grandpa might text someone when texting started later on. You might be in the subway, in a cafe, boarding an airplane, or just walking down the sidewalk. And right next to suddenly someone would be absolutely shouting into their new cell phone with utmost urgency and ferocity.... "OH YES, I WILL MEET YOU LATER ON TONIGHT. IS THAT STILL GOOD FOR YOU?!!!
I just remember thinking ...this is the beginning of the end of normal and nice things for humanity.
I am rude enough to approach those paragons and ask them why they think all the rest of us want to share in their Zoom (phone, TikTok, etc.). I’d say that has about a 60% success rate. The failures have not (yet) included any violence, but I’m a 4’11” 65 year old woman, so that may make a difference.
that, and in grocery store lines, and guys with boombox car speakers with the volume as high as possible so that when they pull up next to you your car becomes a vibrator. which might be pleasant were it not so startling. i actually rolled down my window once because the guy had his rolled down and asked him what makes you think i want to listen to your fucking music. i am old enough to probably be this dweeb’s great grandmother. then the light changed and i charged ahead. of course there is some satisfaction in knowing that the car boomers will prematurely lose their hearing. bullies.
Sometimes I will pretend to talk on my phone as loud as they are, especially when others are getting irritated. Then the loud phone users look at me like “ how dare you!” and sometimes thankfully go somewhere else or they finally get quieter. The clueless ones try to just go louder on their phone. The only thing that will stop them is their vocal cords suddenly snapping or losing oxygen. They will be loud with no phone, unprovoked. Whispering is something they’re incapable of doing. “You may have the right to remain silent, what you lack is the capacity to do so.”
I tried the "louder than you" thing once in a cafe in New York. I started blasting "Fuck Tha' Police," by NWA. Guy looked at me, nodded approvingly, and said, "Dre, right on."
Loud pounding bass-heavy music is my Kryptonite. I hate is so much. They should be stopped. Like why can't you listen to music for yourself, by yourself? Instead of playing it for everyone. I see people take giant BT speakers outside & just sit outside playing loud music all freaking day long. It's almost like they haven't heard of headphones or something.
As a slightly less violent ending to your complaint, perhaps the person could exit the cafe and immediately get hit by one of those annoying scooters resulting in bodily harm to both.
I always fantasize about sitting by their bed or couch when they’re asleep and suddenly start talking about my relationship problems or graphic bowel issues with a bullhorn. Then piping “The Macarena” or “It’s a Small World” into their bathrooms, vehicles and anywhere else they try to find peace. Headphones are the only way I don’t lose it if I have to sit in a coffee shop.
As I wrote in my latest book, I actually find myself listening to an app on my headphones that is the sounds of a cafe, with the discussions low enough in the mix to not be heard. So I'm in a coffee shop, listening to a coffeeshop. Theater of the Absurd.
Also people on London buses, I just want to drift and look out of the window. I don’t want their music or listen to their phone call. Humanity has lost the ability to sit quietly with their thoughts
Good Lord. I own the coffee shop they're polluting with their mindless, rude, insensitive drivel. I'm in the kitchen trying to work, and I have to listen to why Little Miss can't poop. Argghhhhhhhh. Make. them. stop. Although there are also the ones who feel the need to "speak" to each other in volumes that reach the shop next door. Please come to my defense when I'm arrested for finally trying to silence one of them.....
Sometimes these people are not only aware of how rude they are being but want people to hear them or to be witness to the busyness of their lives. Look at me! I have friends, I have a job, I am important!
"Force-sharing" is such a useful term. Thank you. For our crew it happens most often on the M7 bus in Manhattan. In our particular environs, we gotta just breathe and try to keep a straight face til we dash off the bus laughing and cursing our asses off in shock at who we are sharing the planet with.
Not to mention the young woman in the ward opposite me in hospital recently who treated us to the Very Loud calling tone on her mobile all day and waited until lights out to make two scintillating and noisy calls to friends.
JCC adult only lockeroom. A petite 30 something blonde enters from the showers in a bathing suit, toddler on her hip, cellphone in hand as she dictates an email using voice to text. "So if you'll just make an appointment with Jan. We can get all that straightened out in your exit interview period. Please make sure you turn in your ID, pass key, and..."
Voice fades as she heads back to the shower area.
Sweet Mary, we get it Jennifer. You're busy. And important.
If you just start shouting obscenities, Siri will put those in the text and she'll have to start over. Good times. "FUCKING HELL, WHERE'S MY CAR KEYS! Oh, wait, here they are." Kinda thing.
I remember when cell phones had only been around for a year or two (way before they could stream music or video content), there were people who would have phone conversations in public. And because they were receiving a special call on something called a cellular phone that was new, they decided that possibly the cellular phone did not know what a phone call was. This made it necessary to talk IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS like a grandpa might text someone when texting started later on. You might be in the subway, in a cafe, boarding an airplane, or just walking down the sidewalk. And right next to suddenly someone would be absolutely shouting into their new cell phone with utmost urgency and ferocity.... "OH YES, I WILL MEET YOU LATER ON TONIGHT. IS THAT STILL GOOD FOR YOU?!!!
I just remember thinking ...this is the beginning of the end of normal and nice things for humanity.
I am rude enough to approach those paragons and ask them why they think all the rest of us want to share in their Zoom (phone, TikTok, etc.). I’d say that has about a 60% success rate. The failures have not (yet) included any violence, but I’m a 4’11” 65 year old woman, so that may make a difference.
I'm a white middle-aged male in a major American city. I'll got shot in the face, and the press will say I deserved it.
😂
You're not rude, Onehsancare, you're a legend!
It's optimistic to assume they're thinking at all.
Special mention for the lady on the treadmill having a business meeting that lasts all the 30 minutes she's on that blasted machine....
"Making time for herself."
that, and in grocery store lines, and guys with boombox car speakers with the volume as high as possible so that when they pull up next to you your car becomes a vibrator. which might be pleasant were it not so startling. i actually rolled down my window once because the guy had his rolled down and asked him what makes you think i want to listen to your fucking music. i am old enough to probably be this dweeb’s great grandmother. then the light changed and i charged ahead. of course there is some satisfaction in knowing that the car boomers will prematurely lose their hearing. bullies.
Sometimes I will pretend to talk on my phone as loud as they are, especially when others are getting irritated. Then the loud phone users look at me like “ how dare you!” and sometimes thankfully go somewhere else or they finally get quieter. The clueless ones try to just go louder on their phone. The only thing that will stop them is their vocal cords suddenly snapping or losing oxygen. They will be loud with no phone, unprovoked. Whispering is something they’re incapable of doing. “You may have the right to remain silent, what you lack is the capacity to do so.”
I tried the "louder than you" thing once in a cafe in New York. I started blasting "Fuck Tha' Police," by NWA. Guy looked at me, nodded approvingly, and said, "Dre, right on."
Loud pounding bass-heavy music is my Kryptonite. I hate is so much. They should be stopped. Like why can't you listen to music for yourself, by yourself? Instead of playing it for everyone. I see people take giant BT speakers outside & just sit outside playing loud music all freaking day long. It's almost like they haven't heard of headphones or something.
I mean, if it's a song I LIKE, I'll sing or dance along (in the car) and then get irritated when they drive off mid-song.
As a slightly less violent ending to your complaint, perhaps the person could exit the cafe and immediately get hit by one of those annoying scooters resulting in bodily harm to both.
I always fantasize about sitting by their bed or couch when they’re asleep and suddenly start talking about my relationship problems or graphic bowel issues with a bullhorn. Then piping “The Macarena” or “It’s a Small World” into their bathrooms, vehicles and anywhere else they try to find peace. Headphones are the only way I don’t lose it if I have to sit in a coffee shop.
As I wrote in my latest book, I actually find myself listening to an app on my headphones that is the sounds of a cafe, with the discussions low enough in the mix to not be heard. So I'm in a coffee shop, listening to a coffeeshop. Theater of the Absurd.
I so enjoy your grouch (I might have written “inner grouch..but let’s face it..) 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Also people on London buses, I just want to drift and look out of the window. I don’t want their music or listen to their phone call. Humanity has lost the ability to sit quietly with their thoughts
Good Lord. I own the coffee shop they're polluting with their mindless, rude, insensitive drivel. I'm in the kitchen trying to work, and I have to listen to why Little Miss can't poop. Argghhhhhhhh. Make. them. stop. Although there are also the ones who feel the need to "speak" to each other in volumes that reach the shop next door. Please come to my defense when I'm arrested for finally trying to silence one of them.....
Worth a shot:
https://www.amazon.com/stores/Loop/page/628C084D-8F70-43B3-AC7A-9670821AE7D9?ref_=ast_bln&store_ref=bl_ast_dp_brandLogo_sto
Sign: “Please turn off volume on mobile(s) while here!”
Sometimes these people are not only aware of how rude they are being but want people to hear them or to be witness to the busyness of their lives. Look at me! I have friends, I have a job, I am important!
And on buses in London (with their bag of shopping on the seat next to them).
Your backyard is not a cell phone booth for you and your guests, and no you do not need to talk louder so that they can hear you. 😬
"Force-sharing" is such a useful term. Thank you. For our crew it happens most often on the M7 bus in Manhattan. In our particular environs, we gotta just breathe and try to keep a straight face til we dash off the bus laughing and cursing our asses off in shock at who we are sharing the planet with.
Not to mention the young woman in the ward opposite me in hospital recently who treated us to the Very Loud calling tone on her mobile all day and waited until lights out to make two scintillating and noisy calls to friends.
Scene right before I read this:
JCC adult only lockeroom. A petite 30 something blonde enters from the showers in a bathing suit, toddler on her hip, cellphone in hand as she dictates an email using voice to text. "So if you'll just make an appointment with Jan. We can get all that straightened out in your exit interview period. Please make sure you turn in your ID, pass key, and..."
Voice fades as she heads back to the shower area.
Sweet Mary, we get it Jennifer. You're busy. And important.
If you just start shouting obscenities, Siri will put those in the text and she'll have to start over. Good times. "FUCKING HELL, WHERE'S MY CAR KEYS! Oh, wait, here they are." Kinda thing.