Archive - Shalom Auslander's Fetal Position

In Praise of Shitmakers

Imposters of the world, unite

Dec 6 •

Shalom Auslander

November 2024

My Petition for Someone To Please Kindly Inform Me of the Next Petition, Thank You Very Much.

I'm signing everything, goddamn it.

Nov 24 •

Shalom Auslander

The Flower That Laughs

On Being Media Clean for Eight Wonderful Days

Nov 15 •

Shalom Auslander

We’re Way Past Heroin Here

A cry for prescription help

Nov 8 •

Shalom Auslander

The House That Wouldn't Download

An ultramodern love story.

Nov 1 •

Shalom Auslander

October 2024

September 2024

Thoughts of a Thought Leader

"Think, dammit, think!"

Sep 27 •

Shalom Auslander

A Final (Delicious) Solution

I don't usually delve into the seedy world of politics, but it is clear to me that our nation is facing two dire existential threats, threats so real…

Sep 21 •

Shalom Auslander

Red Fish, Blue Fish, I Can't Afford Tuna Fish

Sep 13 •

Shalom Auslander

What If It’s Funny?

The Comfort of Comical Causation

Sep 6 •

Shalom Auslander

August 2024

A Plague of Seriousness

It's spreading, and I have it bad.

Aug 30 •

Shalom Auslander

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